Redemption

WOW!  Its been a while since I've posted.......The fact is that I let life run me for a few years until I could MAKE some changes (set the sails) in order to press forward again.  Ive made a gazillion excuses, but the fact is that I allowed it to happen.  As a "good" trainer, your life is essentially dedicated to giving all of yourself to better those around you.  You sacrifice your own time, energy, and goals in order to help others' accomplish theirs.  I have always had a problem with saying "NO" to others and before you know it, you're headed toward burnout and life balance is gone.  Selfless, giving, kind, and loving people WANT to make an impact and positive influence.  Its HARD to do anything but give ALL that you have to the betterment of others for fear that personal goals may appear "selfish".

The people that I respect the most have a balance and have drawn a line in the sand that will never be compromised in order to keep their lives in check.  God created each individual with unique passions and personalities in order to place you in a position to glorify him in ALL that you do and in the exact place you are in at that moment.  If we continue to seek him in those places, we are blessed with life lessons and "wisdom".  It is up to us and OUR free choice to MAKE set the sails of life's storms to redirect our paths.  Some of us are too stubborn and self reliant to do so UNTIL it all starts to unravel.  We, as rebels, have to get to a point of being sick and tired of being sick and tired.  We hit our breaking point and finally choose to let go, give it to God, and have faith in him.  When we do, and MAKE the HARD decisions to DO what we know we should, the weight lifts from our shoulders, and we are finally free.  Peace replaces regret.  Hope replaces anxiety.  We stop trying to force pieces of a puzzle into place that don't belong with a hammer and simply trust in him.

Running has always been my time with God.  Its been my medicine for clarity, and each run eventually ends with the answers and decisions I know I SHOULD make.  Yesterday's run was another example.  I have a LONG day and my drive is not a short one.  I am absolutely TOAST at the end of my day and always on my feet going wide open.  I reconnected with a friend I went to college with that lives in Due West.  I travel through Due West on my way home at 7pm.  We made a commitment to each other to run at 7pm.  We've been at this for 5 weeks now.  (Redemption has to have a starting point).  I do NOT "feel" like going for a run at 7pm at the end of my work day and at the tail end of a 2 hour drive.  Yet, I drag my tired bones out of the car, lace my shoes, and hit the road.  If I didn't have Friedrich, I am almost certain I wouldn't, but we count on and believe in bettering each other.  I chose a 7.5 mile loop for us yesterday.  I don't know why, but I always choose a tougher option on the days I don't "feel" like it.  I think I do this because I know after a few miles and hills, the "hunger" comes back and I'm ready to GO!  After years of being a competitive runner, I know enough to not do too much too soon.  I was reminded of this yesterday.  Around the half way point, there is a mile long up hill grind......I checked my pace and got ANGRY!  2 years ago I averaged 6:00 per mile for 26.2 miles and I couldn't hit close to that for a 7 mile run.  I pushed with everything I had and my last mile clocked in at 6:37.....WHY would I get angry?  WHY would I crank it out in an attempt to be where I was 2 years ago after 5 weeks back to running after a 2 year layoff?  I know better than that!  The fact is most of us are impatient and fail to be reminded of the BIG picture.  I know it will take a year of training SMART to get back to where I want to be.  So.......,why risk sabotaging the BIG picture goal with a temper tantrum and frustration because I want it NOW?  God reminded me that we do that WAY too much with LIFE.  We miss his BIG picture blessings because of our rebellious, selfish, and impatient nature.  Stay the course.  Be patient.  The time WILL come.  Its our job sometimes to hold our own shirt tails, take deep breaths, and simply keep placing one foot in front of the other with the BIG picture in mind.  Slow progression is still PROGRESSION.  Don't derail progress toward the ultimate goal with reckless efforts to satisfy short term battles.  Lets press on consistently pursuing the victory of the war!